20 best relationship books for couples
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20 Best Relationship Books for Couples

Relationships… we don’t like living without being in one, and sometimes, we don’t know what to do when we are in one! But coaches, experienced people who’ve not just survived but also thrived in their relationships sometimes come to the rescue of people who are struggling to find their space in their relationship and also finding a space for their relationship altogether in the form of some relationship books for couples.

Healthy relationships are not a myth. They exist and beautifully so! But is there a definition for a healthy relationship? Probably! But I believe that a relationship that keeps both members of the couple happy is a healthy one! Speaking of healthy relationships, one healthy habit is reading these relationship books as a couple and understanding the art of making it work, because, let’s face it, every relationship does require some effort until it becomes a smooth-sailing ship. Until our cruise is under control, why not both take the driving seat and revel in its joys?

Here’s a compiling of 20 best-selling, and super helpful relationship books for couples that will surely change a thing or two for you.

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Best Relationship Books for Couples

1. The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts by Gary Chapman

the 5 love languages by gary chapman

Yes, it’s cliche to add The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman to this list of best relationship books, but it’s also impossible to go ahead without it. His insights about a person’s different love language, reactions, expressions, and thought processes help one see through the people we date. A New York bestseller, the book is a self-help guide to those seeking solutions on dealing with their partners who don’t express love the same way as they do!

Personally, the book helped me in several ways. It helps one appreciate individual differences and fall in love & accept their partners the way they are. Expectations became more justified and disappointments became lesser!

2. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman and Nan Silver

the seven principles for making marriage work

One of the top-most relationship books, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is, as the title suggests, “A practical guide from the foremost relationship expert.” I choose to call this book a “wholesome” guide to couples for its far-reaching tips for people struggling to find solutions in the various areas of their relationship, be it love, finance, misunderstandings, or faith. Based entirely on research, this book is a must-read!

3. Attached by Amir Levine, M.D., and Rachel Heller, M.A.

attached by amir levine

Are attachments really as bad as people say they are? Not really, as long as we know what our attachment style is, and how it is POSSIBLE to alter our choices and behavior on the basis and extent of our attachment style. Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller possesses the strengthening qualities to work on a relationship based on our attachment styles after recognizing, understanding and resolving issues relating to it.

4. Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel

mating in captivity by esther perel

Emotions are inevitable in a relationship. But offering emotional freedom to your partner could spark the dying spirit of one’s sex life is the main theme of Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel. The ideas enlisted in this book are so unique, that it is indeed one of the best relationship books for couples on the market!

5. Toxic In-Laws by Susan Forward

toxic in-laws by susan forward

Whoa whoa whoa! Did she really write about toxic in-laws? Well, she did, making this one of the best relationship books for people fighting this issue. While marriage is between two people, it’s not possible to cut everyone out of our lives, especially the in-laws. And sometimes, they become toxic, controlling, overbearing, and the like. Should you allow them to wreck your marriage? Absolutely not! Toxic In-Laws by Susan Forward will help you with some coping techniques.

6. Big Friendship by Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman

big friendship book

Sometimes, we don’t need direct advice but just small pieces of information here and there. Big Friendship by Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman is similar, offering stories of their experiences, interviews, and other stories from close ones, establishing that if there is one relationship to count upon, then it is friendship. After all, friendships make us better humans, thus contributing to better relationships with others. 

7. Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson

hold me tight br Dr Sue Johnson

Like I established in the beginning, that a relationship is also work until you understand each other with the intention of sticking on and staying together. One of the best ways to do that is communication, and Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson is just what you need to understand the art of communicating yourself to your partner! Some exercise throughout the book is something both of you will enjoy, making it one of the widely-read relationship books for couples.

8. How to Be an Adult in Relationships by David Richo

How to Be an Adult in Relationships by David Richo

Now now… let’s not take names, shall we? How to be an Adult in Relationships by Dabid Richo will take you through understand love differently by throwing light on the concept of “mindful loving” with the core concepts of attention, acceptance, appreciation, affection, and allowing. “Most people think of love as a feeling,” he says, “but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present.

9. On Love: A Novel by Alain de Botton

On Love: A Novel by Alain de Botton

Not all relationship books need to be self-help manuals. Sometimes, a story is enough to understand if we’re following a pattern that could lead to the sad demise of our relationship. On Love: A Novel by Alain de Botton is the story of a couple from finding one another to losing. Their journey offers subtle messages on relationships and marriages. I suggest you read it together, as a couple than separately!

10. Relationship Goals: How to win at Dating and Marriage by Michael Todd

Relationship Goals: How to win at Dating and Marriage by Michael Todd

Healing through heartbreak isn’t easy. But the process can become one if we let faith and God interfere and take over the process. Michael Todd shares his own journey while offering a lot of spiritual advice on making a date or a marriage count. What makes Relationship Goals one of the best relationship books is how it deals with common relationship problems so uniquely!

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11. Marriage Rules by Harriet Lerner

Marriage Rules by Harriet Lerner

If you’re struggling to have “the conversation” about some things that are not working for you, pick this book and read it together! The rest will flow like you never thought. Call it rules, tips, or simply “must do’s,” Marriage Rules by Harriet Lerner talks sense, the one thing we might miss out on when in love!

12. How to Be Single and Happy by Jenny Taitz, Psy.D.

How to Be Single and Happy by Jenny Taitz, Psy.D.

Let’s face it, there’s no better relationship in the human world than the one we have with ourselves. The spiritual world is a different story altogether. How to Be Single and Happy by Jenny Taitz is one of the best relationship books for singles. Savvy, straightforward, and on point, this book speaks to singles on how showing compassion towards themselves will take them longer than any date or relationship.

13. No More Fighting: 20 Minutes A Week To A Stronger Relationship by Alicia Munoz

No More Fighting: 20 Minutes A Week To A Stronger Relationship by Alicia Munoz

Arguments, fights, misunderstandings, more fights… the cycle goes on unless we make the conscious effort to make it stop! Sometimes, no matter how much a couple wants to be together, they need an intervention that would help them empathize with one another. No More FightingL 20 Minutes a Week to a Stronger Relationship, therefore, is one of those relationship books in the market that helps you take the highway than the convoluted roads! Real case studies, the stories, and the facts will unearth the layers of love hidden behind all the toxicity.

14. The Ultimate Relationship Workbook For Couples by Ari Sytner

The Ultimate Relationship Workbook For Couples by Ari Sytner

 

We all hit rocky paths; during this phase, the happy roads feel like a mirage, only until we actually cross the rocks, falling and lifting each other, to find your happy road again. The Ultimate Relationship Workbook for Couples is one of those relationship books that offer simple, but effective exercises for couples willing to cross that rocky path together.

15. Wired for Love by Stan Tatkin

Wired for Love by Stan Tatkin

Ten principles… just ten principles by Stan Tatkin in Wired for Love, and we will explore the areas of developing a loving brain. We all enjoy relationships, but making them last is what counts. In this book, we understand how our brains are pre-wired for selling security, attachment, and rituals in a relationship. But do we not let it cause conflicts and make the relationship a healthy one? Stan Tatkin answers in this mind-blowing relationship book.

16. Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication by Oren Jay Sofer

Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication by Oren Jay Sofer

One of the best relationship books for couples, Say What You Mean by Oren Jay Sofer uses the theory of mindfulness and establishing nonviolent communication with our partners. Sometimes, we say things we don’t mean, making situations more pressing than required. But by being mindful, and making communication styles nonviolently effective, a relationship lasts longer.

17. Loving Bravely by Alexandra H. Solomon Ph.D.

Loving Bravely by Alexandra H. Solomon Ph.D.

Not all the work needed in a relationship requires both individuals. Sometimes, working on a relationship also means working on ourselves before throwing ourselves at people in a non-magnetic way. Loving Brave by Alexandra H. Solomon is one of those kinds of relationship books that makes introspection significant to fix errors in a relationship with someone. The book has an amazing way to make an individual more self-aware, making us sound like mature individuals in a relationship who know where they lack individually and how they can make things better together by indulging in self-analysis.

18. 201 Relationship Questions: The Couple’s Guide To Building Trust by Barrie Davenport

201 Relationship Questions: The Couple’s Guide To Building Trust by Barrie Davenport

Date night coming up? Is your relationship making the right turns? Then it’s time to take it up a notch with this one-of-a-kind one of the many relationship books, 201 Relationship Questions. The book takes a couple through questions about trust, intimacy, and more, igniting a conversation that will build a lifelong relationship.

19. Woulda. Coulda. Shoulda by Jennifer Hurvitz

Woulda. Coulda. Shoulda by Jennifer Hurvitz

An absolute delight from among other relationship books, Would. Coulda, Shoulda by Jennifer Hurvitz is the perfect guide to those considering separating at the brink of a problem. Sometimes, there’s still a way of working around the crappiest of marriage issues, and this book is just what every married couple considering divorce should read before taking that life-changing call. The experiences shared by Jennifer Hurvitz in the most relatable manner possible helps one not just see the silver lining, but the intentions within, making us more resilient towards minor issues and looking beyond. Basically, the book revolves around the theme, “appreciate what you have before it’s gone!’

20. The Sex-Starved Marriage by Michele Wiener Davis

The Sex-Starved Marriage by Michele Wiener Davis

Okay, so there’s no shame accepting that some marriages reach the dry area of their sex lives. But should that be the end of a beautiful marriage? The Sex-Starved Marriage by Michele Wiener Davis is one of those helpful relationship books that offer suggestions on how to kick out the starvation period and increase the appetite for the lost sex in a marriage, bringing both partners on the same page. So, yes, this is something that you should read together as a couple!

Are there any other relationship books that you read and think will help others? Mention them in the comment section below to benefit those going every length and breadth to keep their relationship soaring high. I hope this list of the best relationship books for couples helps you with some of the best to add to your shelves. That said, I also hope your relationship never hits a rocky path you can’t get out of!

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Stay in love, stay in faith, stay safe!

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Hemali Adhiya is the co-founder and author of the e-magazine Love Smitten. Alongside writing and editing for several other websites, she hosts a YouTube Channel- Total Angrezi. Traveling is her way to unwind, and she loves recording these experiences!

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